Mr. Skinny kneels before the Tall One

I don’t know if my contact within the Barack camp is O’full of it, but Mr. 73% may tour Lincoln’s tomb during his Springfield Presidential announcement.

I had suggested earlier that all REPUBLICAN Presidential candidates must travel to papa Lincoln’s tomb to reflect on why we are Republicans and how we have deviated from the ideals of the party he created.

Apparently, one candidate really liked my idea: but it was DEMOCRAT Obama, who may beat every GOP pretender to the punch and launch his Presidency with Lincoln’s legacy and tomb as a backdrop.

I promise you this: if Barack tours Lincoln’s tomb, I may vote for the Skinny One.

I have always like him personally, but touring the tomb shows class and a reverence of history that transcends party lines.

Lincoln's Coocyx For Sale

Following the dumbest war in our history, spiraling debt, and the desire to peddle fear for political purposes, our Republican leadership has so fully disgraced the legacy of “our” Abe, that we should complete the rape, unearth the tall one and EBAY his clavicle, toe bone, rib tips, everythin--at least we call upon him once more to help reduce our national debt. For if a Lincoln letter can fetch one hundred grand, just think what we could get for his femur.

Too many fat elephants have been so seduced by profits, pensions and the seedy politics of winning at all costs, that they have forgotten about you, the people.

So a national GOP pilgrimage is in order--no not to that “Abe Lincoln West World” museum, where local legend says Lincoln once peed, but the hallowed ground of his actual tomb.

A grand tour is required to not only rub the brass nose of sad Abe, but to wander inside the dark, dank tomb and reflect upon A. Lincoln’s call for union “…with malice toward none, with charity for all”.

So let it be written, that all Republicans—including all 2008 GOP Presidential candidates--shall travel to the final resting place of Pa Pa Lincoln, the father of our party.

Once there, pledge to stop acting like self absorbed fools and begin to rebuild our party according to his ideals. For if we don’t start acting like Lincoln--Americans first, Republicans second—-we should dig him out, cut him up and hawk his 206 remaining bits to the highest bidders. At least then, he would respect us for our honesty.